we are all temporary beings. in the end, we all deserve a companion who knows us and our loved ones deeply, advocates for our wishes, and brings us comfort. this truth is the heart of my offering to you.
definition: end-of-life doula
a well-prepared fellow traveler who is unafraid to journey alongside people and pets through the wilderness of dying, death, and grief.
Meet Your Doula
My name is Kelley Iris (she/her) and I am a trained end-of-life doula based in Richmond, Virginia.
I offer emotional and practical support services to people and pets who will one day die (in other words, everyone), and to loved ones and caregivers, to ease the dying process for all.
how will a death doula support you and your loved ones?
We ease fear and uncertainty
Facing our mortality and that of our loved ones is scary. Most of us do not want to engage with the reality that death will meet each and every one of us, including our pets, and we don’t know when or how it will happen. This avoidance leaves us unprepared and unmoored when the time arrives. A doula helps you plan ahead and know what to expect, and also serves as a calm presence, unafraid to be with death and grief.
We guide and bring joy
We guide you through identifying what matters most to you, having tough conversations with your loved ones and medical providers, understanding what the dying process may look like, and creating an environment for you and your loved ones’ final moments that feels peaceful (or however you want it to feel). That includes experiencing your favorite things with your favorite people and pets until the very end.
We bear witness
We are non-judgmental and trained to be fully present listeners. We hold space for you to reflect on your life and legacy - what you’re proud of, what you wish you’d done differently, what is left undone and how you might complete important matters now, and how and when to share final words of love and wisdom. We support you in creating sacred moments that reflect your values and beliefs. We are at the bedside during the dying process and with your loved ones as they grieve.
We coordinate and advocate
We connect you with community resources to support your well-being, including collaborating with hospice and other medical providers, spiritual counselors, funeral directors and crematories, music and pet therapists, and more. We advocate for you when engaging these resources, so that your wishes are known and carried out, your gender, sexual orientation, and cultural identities are honored, and your loved ones are respected and cared for, too.
our shared values
My practice is trauma-informed and emphasizes consent and bodily autonomy, including after death. I approach my services without a religious, political, or cultural agenda - my client’s beliefs and desires lead the way - except I will refuse service to anyone who displays bigotry or abuse of any kind.
I am a proud member of the LGBTQIA+ community and a fervent advocate for our community’s rights and protections, including at the end of our lives. I prioritize providing services to community members and our allies, as many LGBTQIA+ folks are under-served and experience discrimination during the final stages of life or when seeking care for loved ones. To work well together, it is essential that we share a commitment to caring for the LGBTQIA+ community.
contact me
If you are interested in hiring me or have any questions, share your details in the form on this page or send an email to kelleyiris.doula@gmail.com. Please do not include any medical or other sensitive personal information in your message.
I look forward to connecting with you soon!